Well, I wanted to give y’all an update on my social distancing and how things are going.
You know if you keep a Beer in each hand you can’t
accidentally touch your face.
I am starting to understand why pets try to run out of the
house when the door opens.
Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we
just keep washing our hands???
I’m so excited; it’s time to take the garbage out to burn.
You think it’s bad now?
In 20 years our country will be run by people home schooled
by day drinkers…
Your Quarantine name is the last thing you ate and your high
school mascot.
Me? ‘Bacon Eagle”
Day 7 at home and the dog is looking at me like, “See? This is
why I chew the furniture.”
Home schooling question: Does having your children fix you
mixed cocktails count as a chemistry lesson? (Sorry, I’m new
at this) ��
My Mom always told me I wouldn’t accomplish anything by
laying in the bed all day, but look at me now! I’m saving the
world!
If you get an email with the subject “Knock Knock” don’t open
it.
It’s a Jehovah Witness working from home.
I swear my fridge just said: “what the hell do you want now?”
Coronavirus has turned us all into dogs.
We roam the house all day looking for food.
We’re told “no” if we get too close to strangers.
And we get really excited about car rides.
If anyone owes you money, go to their house now. They should
be home.
Homeschooling Day #3: they all graduated. #Done.
I’m giving up drinking for a month.
Sorry, punctuation typo.
I’m giving up. Drinking for a month